Johann Bach was arrested last night in Goa, India. For trying to sell a stolen piano.
Yeah, yeah. I know, I know. But that’s what the papers wrote. And no, I am not drunk, though I wish I were.
Johann Bach happens, says the papers, to be a Nazi war criminal on the run ever since the end of the Second World War. A former SS Colonel, says one website (since he’s now 88, he would have been born in 1920 and this would him a Colonel at the age of 25 at the latest, in 1945, which I find kinda fishy, but then I always had a nasty suspicious mind) who was complicit in the murder of 12000 Jews in a concentration camp (called Marsha Tikash Whanaab, for Himmler's sake) in East Berlin (East Berlin in the Second World War, huh?).
Anyway, now that was a long sentence or wasn’t it?
OK, to get back to the alleged point, this alleged war criminal was allegedly living for the past six decades in Argentina, Canada, Bulgaria, and possibly in Yemen before turning up in India five months ago. In Goa he allegedly tried to sell a 17th Century piano he’d plundered from a museum in Berlin during the war and this is what allowed the authorities, who had already been tipped off by the “Israelis” and Germans, to go after him. OK, just you tell me how he lugged around a piano of any sort, let alone a 17th century museum piece, for the last (at least) 63 years. You tell me.
Bach the Youngest was trying to get away from the cops through the forest at night when he was nabbed…if you believe the reports.
Since the German consulate in Mumbai is unaware of this alleged arrest, and the fact that Bach has been flown to Berlin by the German spy agency Perus Narkp (for the slow on the uptake, an anagram for Super Prank) I might wonder why the people who concocted this hoax left the “Sebastian” out of Bach’s name.
But then I’ve always had a nasty suspicious mind. 
